Currently Listening A Charlie Brown Christmas: The Original Sound Track Recording Of The CBS Television Special By Vince Guaraldi Trio see related

Something new!

Currently Listening The Other Side of Something By Sara Groves see related

i kill mice for a living

no, i'm not driving around in a "bug-man" truck wearing pleated shorts and those khaki shirts that stand on their own, and i'm not the newest employee of the little rock zoo. i kill in the name of science, or so they tell me.

these days i vacillate between calling my work torturous and life-giving. on one had, the research i'm conducting this summer at UAMS will benefit the world of medicine and hopefully help save people's lives in the future. on the other, my experiments must be conducted on fresh liver cells. "Fresh" meaning that I kill the mouse, harvest the cells, and begin the tests before you probably finish your first cup of coffee. upon arriving at my lab last week and hearing this news, i couldn't imagine how anyone could expect me to do this. it's easy, they said: "You just pinch the back of the neck and pull the tail with the other hand until you hear (and feel) a pop." No pain meds, no anesthesia, just a "quick" loss of consciousness. In essence, I'm pulling the first vertebrae away from the scull, thereby performing a "cervical dislocation". Disgusting? Yes. Disheartening? Yes. Necessary? You guessed it.  

thankfully, God has given me much strength and perseverance over the past few weeks. i still wake up and feel like there's a rock in the pit of my stomach when i know i'm going to have to "sacrifice" one (they say "sac" like it's some kind of guilt-free code word), but i know things will get better. as cruel as it sounds, i guess i will eventually become desensitized to it all, although i can't imagine how. i don't think any sane person enjoys inflicting pain and snuffing out life. on a much smaller scale, i suppose that's why mothers are torn apart when they must immobilize their child to get a shot. there is momentary pain and a feeling of cruelty and abandonment, but the mother has in mind the greater good. although there is pain, i must remember that each little smelly mouse is making an immeasurable contribution to a greater good.

fyi: when mice bite, they don't let go until you fling them across the room.

time for a break

Toe Licking Suspect On The Loose In Tulsa

Currently Listening Greetings From Michigan: The Great Lake State By Sufjan Stevens see related

ta da!